Plautdietsch word of the day: hendich
What is sounds like: Someone who is drunk, trying to say "Henry" in low German
What it means: handy, convenient
I’m in kind of a predicament. I’ve met a someone from Jant Seid and we’ve been chatting for about a week. She wants to the next level and meet in person.
The problem is, I told her that I cook Mennonite food because I'm a Penner. The part about being Mennonite is true but I can’t cook anything really (unless boiling frozen wareneki is considered cooking). I also told her that I have a chalet in a resort which is sort of true. I live in a house-trailer in Jant Sied. What is the best way to fix things without ruining my chances of a relationship? (I can also get New Bothwell cheese at 20% off. Do you think I should tell her about it?)
I should also mention that I'm kind of on the rebound. I had my heart set on Annie Shellenberg from Altona. She could make glums wareneki better than my mom and she even knows how to schlacht heena and she washes her car at home to save money! But she went for my best friend and moved to Bolivia. (I'm still kind of heart-broken)
Yours truly, Jacob...waiting for love in New Bothwell. BTW, I'm willing to shave my head if it would help. What do you think?
Dear waiting for love,
You may want to consider downgrading that chalet description as soon as possible. It’s not like you're living on a road allowance in Chortitz, right? As far as the cooking, it really doesn’t take any cooking skills to fry forma varscht. I also think you’d be forgiven for boiling some pre-made wareneki and calling it cooking. Just make sure they are glums wareneki! I think she’d appreciate your efforts.
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