Mennonite Enquirer: Plautdietch proves too difficult for North American Intelligence Agencies

North American Intelligence Agencies including the FBI concede that Plautdietch is too difficult to censor and monitor for misinformation and disinformation. 

It appears that agencies in the US and Canada are throwing in the towel in their efforts to monitor Plautdietch and censor what they might deem unacceptable.  Sources say that the US and Canada have collectively spent over 10 million dollars in the past 3 years on a project code named, "Monitor the Mennos".  The many nuances of low German proved to be just too much for even the best of government censoring abilities.

State run agencies have just released the details of a failed attempt at censoring Plautdeitsch.   Apparently, their algorithms had picked up the details of something that was deemed “suspicious”. The details of the flagged conversation, according to the government translator, had come from a text that described what Canadian intelligence agents referred to as something “explosive” at the MCC thrift shop. This intercepted text seems to have confused even their best minds. It read as follows:

“Ech sie hia bie MCC thrift shop. Ech wull noch no’m zetjreet gone, oba eina houd sich doa benna oba schentlich b’donnat”!

A call was made and the MCC went into immediate lockdown due to what government officials deemed “something explosive” in the washroom (the Plautdietsch interpretation from the word b’donnat = a loud bang like thunder) It turned out to be a false alarm as the government officials report that the “loud bang” that had been reported was not from an explosive device but rather had come from someone who’d experienced the after effects of dried bean and ham hock soup. (jedriede schaubel sup).

The government has since decided to suspend all further efforts of censoring Plautdietsch over the Internet as it has proven to be impossible.

Learn how to taxt in Plautdietsch!

Kjenn jie noch Plautdietsh? Enjoy getting reacquainted with those forgotten Plautdietsch words of yesteryear and learn interesting new phrases that you may have never heard before!  We have three different dictionaries to choose from!

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  • Betty Wilsonmoser on

    I enjoy your site so very much. I am ttr


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