The Mennonite Enquirer has learned that after 145 years of Steinbach being a dance-free community, the city will now openly allow dancing in public. Many thought it would never happen. Mennonites will finally be able to publicly slow dance, tango, foxtrot, polka or twist the night away without being reprimanded by the Gemeinde.
After much research, experts have concluded that drinking does not lead to dancing. In fact, you have less time to engage in intoxicating beverages if you are on the dance floor. There is also no conclusive evidence that dancing leads to more romantic nocturnal activities. (much to the disappointment of many Mennonite women)
There are however conditions to the dancing bylaw being repealed. Councilors have stated that “dirty dancing” will not be tolerated. So to all the Henrys, Johns, Peters, Erdmans and the like,.. you may want to reconsider any “Patrick Swayze” moves while heating up your dance shoes.
Mrs Corny Plett has already dug out some of her old LPs which she's been hiding since she was fifteen years old.
The following are also guidelines in the new age of dance: Couples should allow no more than ½ full body contact during waltzes. Kissing and other displays of intimacy while dancing are also seriously discouraged. This restriction has brought about the ire of many. Mrs. Peter Zuderman says, “you mean after waiting all these years, we’re not allowed a little French kissing while dancing?! I think that's discrimination!” Mrs. John Peters however, is more in agreement with the suggestion, saying, “John can have his usual fun any old time. But when we’re on the dance floor, we should focus on dancing”.
It appears that cultural barriers are also being broken down with the repeal of the old bylaw. The Chjanls Rampe-shu says, “it was never fair that only Chortitzer couples were allowed to go dancing and us Blumenort people had to be content with sipping yerba on the lawn swing”!
Here are the opinions from some of the local residents:
Mary Sawatzky says, “It’s exciting actually. The only dance I ever knew was the Mennonite two step. Some called it the pregnancy polka”. When asked about this obscure dance, Mrs. Sawatsky replied with a smile, “lots of us girls knew it. Step one was, get married and step two was, get pregnant. Or, maybe it was the other way around.?.? Some of us got the two steps mixed up. I’m actually looking forward to learning Chortitzer Tango. Erdman is a very virile man and I can hardly wait to see what he does with me”.
And then there’s Betty Thiessen who says, “as long as I get to lead, things will be just fine. Peter couldn’t dance his way out of the back barn door if I let him lead. You gotta show men how things are done”, Betty adds with a smile.
And with that, here are the Mennonite Enquirer exclusive Chortitzer dance moves.
Have fun with the special dance partner in your life with this totally funny Mennonite Birthday card. Click on image below to find the answer to that age old question: Did drinking lead to dancing?
The Mennonite Enquirer is pleased to finally include the long-awaited thumbprint cookie recipe from the private collection of Mrs. Mary Kornelson.
Thumbprint Cookies
Ingredients
- 1 cup (230 grams) unsalted butter softened
- 2/3 cup (135 grams) granulated sugar plus 3 tablespoons (40 grams) for rolling the cookies
- 2 large egg yolks room temperature
- 1 teaspoon pure vanilla extract
- 1/4 teaspoon salt
- 2 and 1/3 cups (290 grams) all-purpose flour spooned & leveled
- 1/2 cup strawberry or apricot jam
Instructions
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Preheat oven to 350°F (177°C). Line two large baking sheets with parchment paper or silicone baking mats and set aside.
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In the bowl of a stand mixer fitted with the paddle attachment, or in a large mixing bowl using a handheld mixer, cream together the butter and sugar for 1-2 minutes or until well combined. Mix in the eggs yolks, vanilla extract, and salt until fully combined, then mix in the flour. The mixture will be a little crumbly at first but it will come together as you continue mixing it.
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Using a one-tablespoon cookie scoop or measuring tablespoon, measure out the cookie dough, roll into balls, roll each one in granulated sugar (optional), then place on the prepared baking sheets.
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Use your thumb (or the handle of a large wooden spoon) to press an indentation into each ball of cookie dough. Spoon 1/2 teaspoon of jam into the indentation in each one.
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Bake at 350°F (177°C) for 12-14 minutes or until the cookies are set and the bottoms are lightly browned. Remove from the oven and cool on the baking sheet for 10 minutes, then carefully transfer the cookies to a wire rack to cool completely.
- Fill the centers with your favorite jam and chill for 1 hour.
Next week from the Mennonite Enquirer: The followup story of Mennonites gone wild! What do you do in high heels? Are they now socially acceptable?
